The authoritative magazine "Blogger's Voice" (which translated would sound like "The Voice of the Bar Sport" or as the perfect straparlare everything from incompetent and live happily) has finally awarded its highest honor to 'human ingenuity, the "Revolution Man of the Century Award" (which translated would sound like "the most overrated man prize Century "or the like stealing candy from a baby, suck, rincartarle, return and live happily). His significant contributions to the advancement of humanity, his vision and his confidence in the vanguard technology have allowed an evolutionary leap to Western civilization comparable to that between Homo habilis and the Parliamentary League. This man is
Steve Jobs, the founder of Apple and inventor of the technocratic philosophy of "the dirty clothes are washed on a Thursday, no clean clothes, Friday fish."
Thanks to universal suffrage of the people on the network, the Californian magnate has clearly outdistanced other persons, which in principle were given to favored, as Pope Wojtila and Pokemon.
Rating plebiscite is certainly due to last an innovative product from Apple, I-Pad, a tablet for reading electronic books and newspapers that weighs 20 times more than a newspaper, you can not roll under his arm, not you can take to the beach, you can not pick up the dog poop and you can not kill the flies (in the testing phase some attempt has been made, with disastrous results), but is white and very cool (that would be translated to "beautiful soul "or how to marry an ugly woman, disagreeable and low, after realizing that marriage is a man and live a little happier).
After the awards, Jobs was hit by a fit of megalomania, and threatened to continue undaunted to churn out bright white objects, if the world did not pay a stratospheric figure, or at least the account of the dentist. Humanity could support the necessary items to be covered in glossy white. Let's see what will be our destiny.
October 2010. I-Duck
Steve Jobs, more thin, balding and bearded holy man by Hindus, went onstage to present the technological gadget that will surprise the world: a shiny white rubber ducky to be used either as a duck bath, duck pretty ornament or duck yard. With touch screen technology (which translated would sound like "do not leave fingerprints, thanks"), simply brush it emits a reassuring sound of rubber ducky (type Peee Peee). A $ 100 more is on sale version containing the necessary library of MP3 sound of all species of ducks in the world. Complacency and morbidity by the blogger.
September 2012. I-Bic
Steve Jobs, in a wheelchair and an IV of saline, appears on stage with the ultimate lap in science calligraphy. After years of bio-anthropometric study, the engineers at Cupertino are in fact able to synthesize the perfect form for handwriting. For bloggers is a "concentrated tecnosensorialiasmo plastic", is a Bic to the detractors, the ink has been replaced with a stream of particles nano technology absorption color, the visual effect of which is the same ink, smells like dirty hands and the ink as ink.
is disposable as a Bic, but it costs $ 500. The shiny white and endless customization of ring tones and logos with kittens and chicks singing, he decreed the immediate global success.
bloggers use it as a blowgun.
May 2019 - The Hitler from within his
iron lung glossy white, Steve Jobs presents humanity gathered in front of television the last frontier of the Safety Personal Identification (which would be translated to "I wonder if that guy is a Romanian?" or how to be happy and live Svastichella nickname). Using the powerful software
Lombroso reading physiognomy and thanks to the potential interface of the "expanded reality", the handy device allows the user to see through the screen the people around him according to their true nature as race, religion, nationality , sexual preferences are indicated by coloring the shapes of different colors particularly intuitive, for example, pink for homosexuals, and yellow for the Jews.
After the sterile polemics of some bloggers are particularly likely, it was decided to fundamentally change the software to meet the sensitivities of minorities. Now, homosexuals are indicated in yellow and the Jews in pink.
February 2054. The God-
Live global by its staff in the form of white mausoleum's Dairy, Steve Jobs, about to expire, has the absolute object, the synthesis of pure technology, the distillate of 100 years of research, Apple, zero point of artificial intelligence. On the surface it may seem like a small white ball finish. In reality its arcane nanotecnogici circuits allow you to surf the internet, send email, fax, sms, take-away pizzas and fresh flowers all over the world, contains games, all the books of the Vatican Library and the entire collection of vinyl Red Ronnie. And he can also do the divisions in the column. Too bad that all these functions are inaccessible by the user, which can only use it as a ping pong ball.
bloggers from around the world, freed from the stifling grip of technology, a miracle and bring you to play ping pong. The Vatican
start the process of beatification of Jobs and the development is introduced by telephone.
The winner of the 2053 Friends of Maria De Filippi triumphs in Sanremo the song "You who did you steal my heart."
